- A.B.A.
- 1. short for American Bar Association or 2. Arrogant
Bullshit Artists.
- Abuse Of Discretion:
- 1. original meaning, now rarely used, was to describe a
faulty process of reasoning when performing a discretionary act
2. now term means whatever suits our fancy 3. synonymous with term "Black
Hole", i.e. we know its out there but damn if we know what it is.
- Ad Hoc Decision:
- 1. Whatever 2. A screwing so fine tuned it can target a specific hemorrhoid
- Aerobic Activity:
- 1. the healthy practice of going to and returning from back
room meetings.
- Appeal:
- 1. that which makes injustice impossible 2. the process
where time and financial cost to litigants must never be taken into consideration 3.
the process which allows us to do as we damn well please 4. that which covers our
ass.
- Arrogance or Arrogant:
- 1. Judicial self esteem 2. term used by the unenlightened to describe Judges and Lawyers who are confident
and comfortable in their position 3. term applied to those with power to decide
right from wrong without regarding right from wrong.
- Attorney:
- 1. business partners 2. club members.
- Back Room Meetings:
- 1. term synonymous with "open court."
- Bullshit:
- term commonly used by the unintelligent, uneducated or unenlightened when describing misunderstood Legal
Analysis and Judicial Determinations.
- Civil Rights:
- 1. formerly things like right to life, liberty and property
2. more recently things like the right not to be pinched in the ass and the right to
marry insects.
- Constitution:
- 1. common cause of rectal pain in the Judiciary 2.
great document for the resourceful and effective 3.
should be condensed for the unresourceful and ineffective.
- Common Sense:
- 1. form of logic reserved for common
people 2. objectively unverifiable form of logic 3. form of logic that
minimizes or eliminates the highly specialized hair splitting , perpetuitous analysis that
helps us appear more intelligent than the masses 4. form of logic non expert in nature.
- Contempt:
- 1. due process for the assertive or uncooperative 2.
the means by which the Judiciary molds attorneys.
- Discretion:
- 1. judicial free will 2. a great "catch all"
to justify whatever it is we do. 3. former meaning dealt with judicial exercise in
areas where there was no clear law or hard and fast rules. Today discretion is
omnipresent.
- Discretionary Act:
- 1. the exercise of judicial free will unencumbered by law, reason, logic or common sense.
- Due Process:
- 1. perpetuity 2. perpetual motions 3. legal and
procedural minutiae 4. selective adherence to the Secret Canons Of Judicial Conduct
5. process which is not paid for. 6. First, decide how we want the case to
go. Second, formulate a legal logic to support our decision. Third,
manipulate, dissect or eliminate the facts and evidence to support our decision.
Then the rubber stamp doctrine of "judicial discretion" will prevent most
decisions from being overturned!
- End Result:
- 1. one of the things not to be considered [others being race,
color, sex etc.] when rendering legal decisions except when professional embarrassment,
media attention or upsetting the status quo will result 2.
that which can negatively affect objectivity.
- Evidence:
- 1. matters we choose to accept as relevant utilizing a
standard which may be disconnected from objective reality 2. matters that allow us
to direct the course of a trial 3. sometimes called judicial slight of hand.
- Ex parte:
- 1. rule prohibiting inappropriate contact or discussion with
a party other than a Pro Se litigant or the unresourceful
and ineffective.
- Experts:
- 1. one of the best tools devised to deny jury trials to the unresourceful and ineffective 2. those who organize or
disorganize, identify or misidentify and label or mislabel particulate matter into a truth or evidence for recognition by and
consideration of the trier of fact 3. people whose job is similar to the replicators
on Star Trek.
- Fair:
- 1. term means what the Judiciary says it means 2.
adherence to the Secret Canons of Judicial Conduct 3. a festival or gathering.
- Fair and Just:
- 1. term describing a pipedream or fantasy 2. term
describing strict adherence to the Secret Canons Of Judicial Conduct 3. common names
for twins in the Netherlands.
- Free Will:
- 1. judicial discretion
- Honorable:
- 1. worthy of honor because of position instead of
performance.
- Impartial:
- 1. unbiased, objective...whatever the hell that means.
- Income Taxes:
- 1. the best damn hoax in history 2. Washington KY
jelly.
- Independence Of The Judiciary:
- 1. Judicial rationale to justify Judicial Determinations
2. effective argument to cover up mistakes 3. that which assists Judicial self esteem.
- Injustice:
- 1. justice for the unenlightened
2. term used by those not understanding Justice 3.
synonymous with term "Judicial Efficiency".
- IRS:
- 1. the second best damn hoax in history [see Income Taxes]
2. the organization Congress pretends to desire changing 3. the biggest
bluffers and liars in the Country 4. the congressional ATM 5. organization
which forcefully collects voluntary income taxes. 6. sometimes synonymous with
organized crime.
- Judicial Determinations:
- 1. legal decisions which may or may not be based on the
arguments raised 2. decisions made after every possible method of delay has been
utilized 3. usually synonymous with Status Quo.
- Judicial Discretion:
- 1. See Discretion, Discretionary Act and Free Will.
- Judicial Efficiency:
- 1. Fancy word for 'railroading' 2. Synonymous with term Injustice
and phrase "Screw, we don't have time for you." 2. that which takes
priority over full and fair justice.
- Judicial Misconduct:
- 1. term commonly misapplied to a Judge's attempts at
efficiency. 2. mythical, non existent conduct 3. a paradox.
- Judiciary:
- 1. group of Judges forever more impressed with themselves
than they should be 2. group of Judges highly respected and regarded regardless of
their production or quality of work. 3. synonymous with Royalty.
- Jury Nullification:
- 1. formerly power of informed jury to vote their conscience
2. term now considered as offensive and as unmentionable as faggot, nigger, jew,
bitch etc.
- Just:
- 1. abbreviation for the name Justin or Justina.
- Justice:
- 1. the precious and proper administration of laws effectuated
by legal analysis and the Secret Canons of Judicial Conduct; said
administration being unaffected by the end result, even when the end
result is the improper administration of laws. 2. more of a privilege than a right.
3. due to the value of Justice, every possible option of denial should be considered
so it never is dispensed casually, freely or indiscriminately.
- Justice For All:
- 1. "all" in this phrase means those who are left
standing after judiciously applying the Secret Canons of Judicial Conduct and legal analysis to their case 2. phrase really means the
possibility of Justice for all provided the person desiring Justice knows or can pay for
skills effective in the manipulation of legal and procedural minutiae
and the Secret Canons of Judicial Conduct.
- Law:
- 1. the vast selection of written and unwritten ingredients
which we recipe to make Judicial Decisions. 2. analogous to
the Bible in that it can be made to say whatever one desires 3. impossible to break
provided a Judicial Decision incorporates it in some form or
fashion. 4. synonymous with the terms "Silly Putty" and
"Whatever" 5. written word with the power to create illusion of equal and
fair justice for all.
- Legal Analysis or Legal Reasoning:
- 1. thinking usually independent of and unaffected by objective reality 2. the process of using legal terms to
alter, create or deny reality 3. process used to maintain or assist the status quo, power structure and the resourceful
and effective 4. a thought process commonly raised to the level of stupidity
while maintaining the appearance of brilliance 5. sometimes called inverted
intelligence.
- Limine, Motion in:
- 1. selection or elimination of evidence
for the purpose of directing a trial in the direction we feel it should go 2. legal
tool which can never result in injustice due to the right of appeal.
- Logic:
- 1. the word "cigol" spelled backwards 2. term
meaning Logistically Organized Gobbledygook Intended to Confuse
3. form of mental masturbation 4. a great video arcade game.
- Militias:
- 1. fruitcakes under the delusion the Constitution, Bill Of
Rights and the principles this Country were founded on are still in full effect. 2.
terrible followers who won't listen and ask too many questions.
- No one or Noone:
- The secret last name of all Judges so they won't be lying
when they say, "No one is above the law."
- No one is above the law:
- Phrase is analogous to "Santa or the Easter Bunny is
coming." 2. Phrase which results in roars of laughter amongst drunken
Judges and Lawyers.
- Objective Reality:
- 1. that which is unwritten and usually not incorporated into Legal Analysis or Judicial Decisions 2.
that which can not be verified 3. that which requires expert
testimony for verification and identification.
- Objectivity:
- 1. whatever is the preferred viewpoint of the judiciary 2. opposite of "reality based"
- Open Court:
- 1. a court having a door that opens and closes without
obstruction.
- Plea Bargain:
- 1. an effective tool to avoid those damn juries and hide prosecutorial misconduct, overcharging and abuse. 3.
justice for the unresourceful and ineffective
- Poor:
- 1. the Unresourceful and Ineffective
2. those that shouldn't ask for what they can't pay for.
- Pro Se Litigant:
- 1. litigants with invalid arguments 2. bastards who
forget we are trying to run a business here 3. those who don't understand what
"members only" means 4. those unfamiliar with their place in this world.
- Prosecutorial Misconduct:
- 1. term commonly misapplied to Prosecutor's attempts at
efficiency. 2. mythical, non existent conduct 3. a paradox.
- Relevance or Relevant:
- 1. that which suits the fancy of the Judiciary 2.
synonymous with "Judicial personal opinion".
- Res Judicata:
- 1. legal term describing revolving door used to give the
bum's rush out the courtroom to the Unresourceful and Ineffective
2. Latin term meaning, "we made up our mind before you came in and this
procedure covers our ass." 3. legal doctrine used to deny the Unresourceful and Ineffective a full and fair hearing on the
merits 4. legal tool used to create the illusion of due process.
- Resourceful and Effective:
- 1. terms used to describe those having the means or ability
to command our attention [i.e. wealthy, connected to a power structure, able to attract
media attention] 2. those effective in the manipulation of legal and
procedural minutiae and the Secret Canons of Judicial Conduct 3. those whose
financial, political or social status and resources are incorporated into our Legal Analysis 4. can be used to describe the rich
Compare to Unresourceful and Ineffective
- Right:
- 1. A turn one can take at some red lights. 2. our spin on the events before us 3. Judicial Determinations 4. regulated privileges or favors
granted by Government.
- Right To Bear Arms:
- 1. regulated privilege granted by the Constitution giving
Citizens the right to wear tank tops, athletic T-shirts, sleeveless blouses or in some
form or fashion leave their arms exposed in public.
- Rights:
- 1. The turns one can take at some red lights. 2. regulated privileges 3. favors of Government.
- Royalty:
- 1. not used, but in principle refers to the Judiciary or the resourceful and effective
- Sovereign:
- 1. outdated term commonly used by anti-government groups.
2. threatening term which is best avoided 3. vague, undefined.
- Status Quo:
- 1. golf on Thursdays 2. Judicial "comfort
zone" 3. synonymous with term "loyalty."
- Truth:
- 1. whatever experts say for pay
2. whatever the Judiciary decides through the use of Legal
Analysis.
- Unenlightened:
- 1. litigants unknowledgeable regarding our position and
power.
- Unresourceful and Ineffective:
- 1. terms used to describe those not having the means or
ability to command our attention [i.e. the poor, unconnected to a power structure, unable
to attract media attention] 2. those not effective in the manipulation of legal and procedural minutiae and the Secret Canons of Judicial Conduct
3. those whose financial, political or social status or resources is not
incorporated into our Legal Analysis unless said status commands
influence. 4. can be used to describe the Poor 5.
Compare to Resourceful and Effective
- Voice Of The People
- 1. who the hell knows what this means, all voices sound
different to us.
- Will Of The People
- 1. legally unsound, everyone should make out their own will.
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